So, What Numpties Deserve To Be Disembowelled With A Metaphorical Pitchfork Today Then?
From John Langley Bristol, author of 'The Sexual Philanthropist' available on Amazon/Kindle.
I never cease to be amazed by the fact I manage to retain a good sense of humour when most in this world seem to be losing, or have already lost the plot, or, are still rummaging to find a plot to lose in the first place for reasons yet unbeknown to them.
You see, up until about five minutes ago, I had no idea that the UK government website had an entire section devoted to acronyms. Trust me, it's true, and you too can refer to this via something entitled 'Style guide - A to Z - Guidance.' I rather like the term 'Style Guide' as if it's somehow couture in presentation and of such meaningless drivel I can imagine John Cleese being behind naming it such as a piss-take on the establishment that some idiot in government took seriously and adopted. Unlike the 'Ministry of Silly Walks' which, much to my continued disappointment, should have been made mandatory, and Boris the latest star turn.
Ah well. As far as acronyms go, I'm totally convinced that there is someone in the bowels of Whitehall who never sees the light of day and is fed and watered through a hatch in the door, and kept there for the sole purpose of inventing acronyms to suit whatever purpose is required of him - because it has to be a mad professorial type who looks like Gandalf on amphetamines and has an entire library of dictionaries from around the world at his fingertips from which to access the correct acronym for all occasions.
Today I woke up to news of the latest one, NEET. As in 'Not in Education, Employment, or Training. Perhaps it simply involves far too many letters, but as hard as I search the government website I'm surprised to find no reference at all to an acronym for B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T - yet. However, I live in hope.
Anyway, we have NEET but no TIDY. So, NEET it is then, for now. So, who exactly are these deemed not to be in education, employment, and training? Apparently, those who were so freaked out by the pandemic that they no longer want to attend school, or engage in any activity that involves leaving the security of their own home - such as for employment, and who seemingly spend their time engaging in activities such as TikTok and popping copious amounts of antidepressants that, by all accounts, have seen a huge rise in uptake that according to the 'National Institute for Cost Effectiveness', aka NICE, created a whole new generation of pill-poppers in the eleven to seventeen-year-old age group. Mind you, this report does date back to 2022, and I cannot imagine things getting any better since then. Meanwhile, the shareholders of the big pharma companies are rubbing their hands in glee from a whole new generation of addicts helping along their even healthier dividends and a few extra boxes of Montecristo Number One to enjoy while celebrating the extra dosh pouring into their already bulging bank accounts. Excellent work!
Not that I would ever wish to cast aspersions on the post-millennial generation, and neither would I be in any way cynical either, because if you've been reading my blog posts for any serious length of time you would fully recognise that such things are beyond me. However, I have to say that the mollycoddled progeny so enjoyably wrapped in the finest cotton wool available to humankind by parents who see their
little darlings as 'friends' rather than offspring haven't exactly helped toward creating a generation of robust x, y's, and z's.